Domestic violence is one of the most appalling social phenomena nowadays. Whatever the origins or the reasons for its occurrence, it should be nipped in the bud as soon as possible. Here is what you should do if you have fallen victim to domestic violence.
First and foremost, you should eliminate the source of domestic violence. So, if you are in a relationship that presents a serious threat to your physical and mental health, do not hesitate to walk out of it right now! I know that the promises of your partner that he will hurt you never again may sound very convincing, but they last only until the next time he gets mad at you. Remember that the responsibility for breaking away from the vicious circle of domestic violence is in your own hands.
On the other hand, if your partner (the abuser) has recognized and acknowledged the fact that he has certain issues related to spontaneous aggression, maybe you should encourage him to consult a psychologist and start an anger management therapy.
Of course, there are some stop-gap solutions such as, for instance, an ‘emergency box’ where you should put some cash, spare keys to the car and the house, and a prepaid telephone card. You run away with that when the next episode of domestic violence begins to unfold. Alternatively, you can think of a ‘password’ which, when uttered, will let your relatives and family know that you are in danger and they should call the police.
Your parents’ house is the safest place to go when you flee home after being abused by your partner and don’t forget to take the children with you. Some husbands abuse their children as well. Alternatively, you can stay with some supportive friends, who will most probably encourage you to take legal action against the abuser. Social workers recommend that the victims of domestic violence should call an attorney as soon as they reach a safe place. He will help you get a restraining order against your abusive partner. Also, you may file a police report against him, especially if you’re planning to go to a divorce trial.
Last but not least, once you break away from the abuser, make sure you sign up for a domestic violence support program with the nearest crisis centre, where you will receive emotional support and hear the stories of other victims of domestic violence. This will encourage you to start a new life as an independent woman.
Finally, while men are responsible for most cases of domestic violence, there are some abusive women, too. So, if your sweetheart is throwing stuff at you or threatening to fire a shotgun at you, brother, you should not hesitate to report her to the police. More often than not, domestic violence against men is of psychical rather than physical nature. If, for instance, you wife is constantly accusing you of being unfaithful to her, or if she is preventing you from visiting your parents in the weekend or going out with friends, this can also be regarded as an instance of domestic violence on her part. Very often, women assault their partners under the influence of alcohol or other intoxicating substances. If you share your bed with such a woman, you should encourage her to start a detoxication program or consult a psychotherapist.
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Tags: aggression, domestic violence, domestic violence support program, physical abuse